Get That Man a Dog

Following the publication of “#DEATH Tweet, Book 02 – 140 Perspectives on Being a Supportive Witness to the End of Life” (2011), I began discussing with my lovely wife, Nancy, what writing project would come next. In tossing ideas around, I told Nancy about what I observed when dogs were brought into the hospice ward at Laguna Honda Hospital, where I have worked for years as a hospice volunteer.

The dogs were “healers” to the hospice residents. While holding or petting a canine visitor, an anxious individual would relax, a cognitively impaired resident might find some clarity or focus, an individual person in chronic pain would feel some relief. These outcomes were predictable and consistent. The presence of the visiting dogs also had a calming effect on staff and volunteers.

Both Nancy and I were fortunate to have had dogs in our families when we were growing up. We continued that tradition by bringing dogs into our own family when our children were young. At the time of our discussions of this possible writing venture, we were in the process of saying our long goodbyes to our beloved Golden Retrievers, K.C. and Carter. Nancy recalled what a profound effect the comfort of a dog could have on an angry, sad or anxious child. Equally profound were her memories of watching the joyful play between the dogs and our children, and her own deep sense of peace with our dogs during hikes in the mountains or a simple walk around the neighborhood. We decided to undertake our collaboration to further explore the contributions dogs have made to our lives and the lives of our families, friends and communities.

“#DOG Tweet, Book 01 - 140 Perspectives On What Our Dogs Teach Us About Being Human” will be the outcome of that exploration. While we remain many months from publication (I have given up predicting a schedule), I thought it might be useful to give you a preview.

In general, those in the legal profession work hard, do relatively well financially, but suffer unnecessarily from work-related stress. That suffering manifests not only on the professional “playing field,” but in our homes and communities. While “#DOG Tweet” is not being written for our profession, it could be. While holding or petting a canine visitor, an anxious individual would relax, a cognitively impaired resident might find some clarity or focus, an individual person in chronic pain would feel some relief.

I would like to see our profession thrive in more than financial terms. If this modest work can contribute to that outcome, then I will be happy.

I believe that you may find, in considering your relationship with dogs in general, or a particular dog in your life, you begin to put yourself in touch with who you are and who you might become. I believe that dogs are a bridge - they connect us to what really matters, which is our relationship to other beings.

Humans are storytelling animals. The great majority of your day-to-day communications involve story. Probably your most important story is the one you tell yourself, and others, about yourself. This Self narrative is a tapestry of your beliefs, judgments, experiences and perspectives, woven together with the stories you have inherited from your family, community and culture. You use your narrative to simplify your decision-making and guide your life. And, for many purposes, it works.

However, just as your body changes with time and circumstance, your narrative should do so as well. The problem with using an old narrative in new circumstances is that it can lead you to think and act inappropriately. If you are unable to adapt your narrative, you simply cannot thrive. Even worse, you will look elsewhere for the cause, leading you further still from the remedy - changing your story.

One of the best ways to maintain a thriving life is to keep your narrative supple by approaching your life with an open awareness and a curiosity as to all that you witness. Awareness and curiosity lead to discovery of what is real, unfiltered by narrative. Such discovery often leads to an adjustment of those beliefs, judgments and perspectives that hold you captive to an outdated, rigid story.

So what does all this have to do with dogs?

The meteoric rise of contemplative practices in recent years speaks to an inherent recognition by practitioners that something in their lives is out of sorts. The point of engaging in meditation, yoga, tai chi or Qi gong is to bring a grounded awareness to mind and body, allowing for a more direct and immediate engagement with life. Others find similar relief through engaging in music and the arts or athletic endeavors. The bottom line is that all of these practices serve to alter your perspective of life and your place in it. The great difficulty with most of these practices is that they require routinized time commitment, which most of us believe is unachievable or unsustainable. I firmly believe that, over time, the benefits of a practice greatly outweigh the price of commitment. But many folks just can’t get there.

Dogs, being both guides and healers, offer an alternative path to an aware and thriving existence. Because it is in their nature to attend to humans, dogs are almost impossible to ignore. Since dogs pay attention to things that humans often miss, they are a constant source of surprise and invention. Dogs take you places that you wouldn’t ordinarily go and, in so doing, open your awareness, stimulate your curiosity, and lead you to new discovery. Attending to your dog is a practice in awareness, curiosity and discovery, which, over time, stays with you, even outside your dog’s company. It just doesn’t feel like a practice.

Humans have multiple intelligences. We (particularly lawyers) tend to think of intelligence only in cognitive terms, but for years we have been made aware of, and encouraged to develop, our other intelligences including somatic (physical), emotional, social, spiritual (caring about “more than me”) and integral (using the foregoing intelligences together).

Just as attending to cognitive intelligence opens new opportunities for discovery and engagement, so does attending to the other domains. A dog, in your company, can effectively guide you through, and help you develop, your multiple intelligences.

Let’s just consider some examples.

Just as sight is your primary sense, smell is to your dog. Once you see this fundamental difference, formerly baffling dog behaviors become understandable. Dogs teach us not only to understand differences between species, but differences amongst humans. Dogs grow our understanding and cognitive intelligence.

When you pet or hold your dog, your body releases a hormone, called oxytocin. Oxytocin is most commonly associated with inducing labor contractions and milk ejection in new mothers. It also is known to create social bonding. It lowers your heart and rate reduces your stress hormones. It makes you more trusting and trustworthy. It makes you more curious and gregarious. Your touch also releases oxytocin in your dog. Your dog teaches you how to adjust your body’s chemistry.

It generally is believed that dogs possess no “theory of mind.” That is, dogs can’t think about what others are thinking in the same way as humans. Nor do dogs possess a sense of Self. These traits yield dogs a more fundamental emotional palette. Don’t get me wrong - dogs possess rich emotional lives! They experience universal emotions, such as fear, anger, surprise, sadness and happiness. Dogs also let us know what they are feeling through their postures, gaits, facial expressions and sounds. Because dogs’ emotions are so immediate and transparent, they offer a great training ground for developing your emotional intelligence.

As to the healing capacity of dogs, you need only consider a few examples. A harmonious relationship with your dog reduces stress and blood pressure. The presence of dogs has been shown to increase the survival rate of heart attack victims, improve and extend the quality of life for seniors, help draw out autistic children and relieve the pain of victims of abuse.

If a dog already is of a part of your household, I urge you to more fully appreciate your dog’s gifts to you and your world. Even if a dog is not a daily part of your life, consider coming to know dogs, by attending those belonging to friends and colleagues. “Borrow” a dog for a weekend. You also might foster a dog awaiting adoption and, ultimately, adopt one yourself.

There are only five guarantees that you must make your dog: ample food and water; relief from discomfort; avoidance of fear and distress; protection from pain, injury or disease; and the freedom to express “dog behavior.”

As you develop your relationship with your dog and receive its love and compassion, you may be surprised by what you discover about yourself and your world, how you develop a much more fluid narrative, and how you witness your growing capacity to give and relate to others. With your intelligences bolstered, your life begins to thrive.